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Human history becomes more and more a race between education and catastrophe.
Premature optimization is the root of all evil.
It is better to be quotable than to be honest.
My neighbour asked if he could use my lawnmower and I told him of course he could, so long as he didn\'t take it out of my garden.
Always do right- this will gratify some and astonish the rest.
You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.
The man who goes alone can start today; but he who travels with another must wait till that other is ready.
I have yet to meet a C compiler that is more friendly and easier to use than eating soup with a knife.
A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.
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Always do right- this will gratify some and astonish the rest.
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I never forget a face, but in your case I\'ll be glad to make an exception.
Our government has kept us in a perpetual state of fear - kept us in a continuous stampede of patriotic fervor - with the cry of grave national emergency.
Love is the answer - but while you\'re waiting for the answer sex raises some pretty good questions.
When I am dead, I hope it may be said: \'His sins were scarlet but his books were read.
A radioactive cat has eighteen half-lives.
If FORTRAN has been called an infantile disorder, then PL/I must be classified as a fatal disease.
An inconvenience is only an adventure wrongly considered; an adventure is an inconvenience rightly considered.
Science is like sex: sometimes something useful comes out, but that is not the reason we are doing it
Copy from one, it\'s plagiarism; copy from two, it\'s research.
There are people in the world so hungry, that God cannot appear to them except in the form of bread.
A blind bloke walks into a shop with a guide dog. He picks the Dog up and starts swinging it around his head. Alarmed, a shop assistant calls out: \'Can I help, sir?\' \'No thanks,\' says the blind bloke. \'Just looking.\'
Anyone who considers arithmetical methods of producing random digits is, of course, in a state of sin.
Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. THAT\'S relativity.
Java, the best argument for Smalltalk since C++.
There is a charm about the forbidden that makes it unspeakably diserable.
Why don\'t you write books people can read?
The de facto role of the US armed forces will be to keep the world safe for our economy and open to our cultural assault.
Don\'t sweat the petty things, just pet the sweaty things.
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The use of COBOL cripples the mind; its teaching should, therefore, be regarded as a criminal offense.
Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn\'t go away.
I hear Glenn Hoddle has found God. That must have been one hell of a pass.
Under conditions of competition, standards are set by the morally least reputable agent.
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A hen is only an egg?s way of making another egg.
Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other one off.
When you\'ve seen one non-sequitur, the price of tea in China.
It is only those who have neither fired a shot nor heard the shrieks and groans of the wounded who cry aloud for blood... War is hell.
The object of war is not to die for your country but to make the other bastard die for his.
The full use of your powers along lines of excellence.
Throughout American history, the government has said we\'re in an unprecedented crisis and that we must live without civil liberties until the crisis is over. It\'s a hoax.
Sometimes a scream is better than a thesis.
No one can earn a million dollars honestly.
I want to die in my sleep like my grandfather... not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car...
Every journalist has a novel in him, which is an excellent place for it.
A hen is only an egg?s way of making another egg.
We will not learn how to live together in peace by killing each other\'s children.
We didn\'t lose the game; we just ran out of time.
The most overlooked advantage of owning a computer is that if they foul up there\'s no law against whacking them around a bit.
So I was in my car, and I was driving along, and my boss rang up and he said \'You\'ve been promoted\'. And I swerved. And then he rang up a second time and said \'You\'ve been promoted again\'. And I swerved again. He rang up a third time and said \'You\'re managing director.\' And I went into a tree. And a policeman came up and said \'What happened to you?\' And I Said \'I careered off the road.\'
If everything seems under control, you\'re just not going fast enough.
It is a miracle that curiosity survives formal education.
You can only find truth with logic if you have already found truth without it.
Our government has kept us in a perpetual state of fear - kept us in a continuous stampede of patriotic fervor - with the cry of grave national emergency.
Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
Programming is like sex: one mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life.
[War] might be avoidable were more emphasis placed on the training to social interest, less on the attainment of egotistical grandeur.
University politics are vicious precisely because the stakes are so small.
If you want to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first create the universe.
The fear of death is the most unjustified of all fears, for there\'s no risk of accident for someone who\'s dead.
It is better to be quotable than to be honest.
The first half of our life is ruined by our parents and the second half by our children.
A man can\'t be too careful in the choice of his enemies.
It\'s clearly a budget. It\'s got a lot of numbers in it.
Giving birth is like taking your lower lip and forcing it over your head.
It is better to be quotable than to be honest.
Conservatives are not necessarily stupid, but most stupid people are conservatives
I don\'t believe in the after life, although I am bringing a change of underwear.
I have spoken many a word, therefore, it is fact.
I love Mickey Mouse more than any woman I have ever known.
It is much more comfortable to be mad and know it, than to be sane and have one\'s doubts.
When did I realize I was God? Well, I was praying and I suddenly realized I was talking to myself.
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Descended from the apes? Let us hope that it is not true. But if it is, let us pray that it may not become generally known.
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Heaven is an American salary, a Chinese cook, an English house, and a Japanese wife. Hell is defined as having a Chinese salary, an English cook, a Japanese house, and an American wife.
Do illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup?
最終更新日 : 2012/05/19/(Sat) 02:39
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